4. It is not necessary to control all aspects of the life of a teenager, but it is necessary to control his activities .
For example, in all matters relating to study, you need to keep your finger on the pulse. This does not mean that every evening parents should check the diary marks and “insect” their offspring on the topic: “Why 4, not 5, or why does Masha have 5 and you have 3?” But know how your child is doing at school – necessary. First of all, because most of his life is associated with the school. Of course, it is best if the child himself tells you everything, but this is not always the case.
Nowadays, thanks to high technology, it is easier to recognize grades than before. And you need to know, because every person from time to time there is a desire to relax, to do something, or to avoid work altogether. This, by the way, is not only about studying, it is necessary to ensure that the child performs everything he does in good faith. For example, for the first time I hung a shelf for books in my room and hung it crookedly. I really want to be touched, pat on the head and say: “Well done!” But this is wrong. The habit of working “on the line” is a very terrible thing, because if it has already arisen, then there can be no question of self-esteem. Conscientiousness and self-esteem are interrelated things.
The same with extracurricular activities. Circles, sections, studios. If the child needs this activity and is interesting, he will work in full force. But, if you notice that he has become bungled, lazy, ask why. Maybe he is simply overworked, which often happens lately when children are being chased to a music school, an art studio, and language courses, and also to the sports section. Then you should think about how to unload it. And if the child becomes uninteresting, boring, you should try to return his interest or change the field of activity. It is ridiculous and stupid to create under the lash, and most importantly, it is very dangerous to acquire the habit of low-quality work.
Let me give an example: my son Artem in the fifth grade asked to enroll him in an art school, he was happy to do it, but when in the tenth grade I had to do a diploma there, he said: “I want to quit art. You yourself told me that I can leave her whenever I want. ” We still managed to persuade him not to give up art school and finish the diploma. However, if the desire to quit the artwork had arisen before him, in the eighth grade, we would accept it with respect to his decision.
Unfortunately, this does not concern the fact that they are imposed by direct or hidden advertising. First of all, advertising of things that are dangerous to health – from coca-cola chips, continuing with energy drinks and ending with spices. The risk of harmful products and stimulants is delayed. It seems to teenagers that their health is infinite, that someone else, and they will never die.
When talking about the harmfulness of all these things, the teenager thinks: “This is when there will be more, and indeed there will be.” Such a deep inner conviction in their invulnerability. Therefore, one can endlessly tell them about the harm of this and that – there will be no result. The teenager is adamant: it is dangerous for someone else, but not for him.
And this adolescent conviction in our own invulnerability we, adults, have to consider. When the children of Bazis Club come to Feodosia for their summer holidays, I try to control their purchases. A moratorium is imposed on chips and other similar products.
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